I believe that Winnie The Pooh can teach us almost anything, certainly anything we need to know. The silly little details like how to get a mortgage or flight details can be found on the Internet but for all the good stuff – speak to the bear.
When girls like me first find out that we are like this, we are not at all sure what this is. We know we get all stammary and red when people talk about spanking and we know we get tense when a man that wants to date us won’t make a decision but that is about all we know. And so we end up talking to lots of new people. Some of these people can seem terribly knowledgeable and they are eager to tell us all about everything and how it works.
We are trustful little bears and we listen.
And then all too soon we end up with them wanting to see our bottoms (our real or imagined bottoms) and we realise that they are not interested in what is going on in the rest of us at all.
They just talk about things that make them interested and things that are all about them.
We feel a but stuck and embarrassed and a bit silly.
I always feel I must have the brain of a small bear when these people come and try to see if they can get me to their world.
But this part of us matters and it is all secretive and quiet and we can’t just go and get a library book about it or ask our best friend. We can’t ask the person that wants to tell you because they just want to look at our bottoms.
We have to look in very dark places because that is where secret things live.
But when we do that on our own we can get confused and it can all feel a bit much.
Little bears like us that need these things are not the kind of bears who are happy in dark places.
So we stop and think.
We realise we have lost something.
We can’t find it in dark places because they are not good for us.
We meet other people just like us.
They are looking too.
Then this is what happens if you are very, very lucky.
You (and maybe your friends you are looking with) find someone safe and somewhere safe to be.
In my case a someone came and got me and tucked me under his arm and put me somewhere happy with good people.
It was a very odd sensation and a bit bumpy at first.
Little bears don’t understand new things and they have to have some time to work out what is going on.
The best kind of people that get little bears and take to them safe places know this and don’t pay much attention to snarling and grumping of little bears.
And then this next thing might happen.
This is what happened to me.
I found my small. This small was with me all along and I did not know or maybe it scared me a bit.
My small is my way of being when I am not so important and what I want is not what is going to happen. My small tells me that it is like this not because I am rubbish but because I am loved.
My way of being small is accepting that sometimes I don’t make all my decisions and instead of making those I can just settle down and let myself be loved.
It was always there waiting to be found. I just had to look all around to find it.
I realise that I found my small because standing over me and watching me and making sure it was all OK all along was this other person. He is not in the picture above, above you can see a friend being shown small and maybe saying things like, “Ooo- look! You have a small.”
It is all good now.
I don’t need to go into dark places.
I don’t need to listen to people who are not good for me.
I have found a small within me and the best kind of big who puts his arms around me.
And when I write stuff, I can push it across the table and say, “Here- I wrote this for you.”
Poppy,
I am getting ready to leave my desk and go to lunch with a friend, and I found this post just as I was ready to go. And now I am tapping my forehead and saying, "think, think, think." I think that I have found my small, too, and I love that you have put those words around that feeling, because it is true that "little bears like us that need these things are not the kind of bears who are happy in dark places." Dark places can have heffalumps, and sometimes woozels, and ttwd is never about those things. Because ttwd is what helps me when I am feeling small and scared, and sometimes very Piglet-like, and nothing like Rabbit at all. (I almost never feel like Rabbit, and when I do, it's a sign that I need to hush for a minute, and maybe go to a yoga class. And that's often when the boss of me makes me hush, and I can get settled again.)
I'm so glad that you're "that kind of bear," too, and that you write so beautifully. The way you ended this post made me smile and say, "how perfect."
What a beautiful post! I am smiling here and feeling warm fuzzies. It's definitely given me something to think while I'm out to lunch today.
Lisa's comments abbut almost never feeling like Rabbit made me smile. I used to feel a lot like Eeyore most days but I'm no longer permitted to be Eeyore-ish. I'm still working on those moments when I'm Rabbit-ish though.
Poppy, yes Pooh is a wise little bear.
I'm glad that you found your small, even tops need to do this.
When we go out in the world we sometimes find that we need to put on a suit of armor.
Ofttimes we forget that we are wearing armor, and that the real us cannot be seen because of the armor.
Then we meet a very special person and find that we cannot get close and be recognised because of the armor, this is when we all need help to remove it, if that special person is as special as we think they are, they help.
Does this sound a little like you?
May I recommend, if you haven't already read it, The Tao of Pooh, by Benjamin Hoff.
This little book may help your small grow even wiser.
I don't know about warm fuzzies, but it is a cuddly post, a bit like a certain small, safe in the arms of her Someone Special.
Warm hugs,
Paul.
I went for a long walk today- can't run at the moment, silly muscle/ligament thingy.
And it was the best feeling, I watched the butterflies flutter by (sorry, could not resist it) and this post came and said hello.
Today I was very much Pooh. Sometimes I am Eeyore and very, very often I am Piglet. When I am terribly fond of myself I am Owl or Rabbit and at both times am insufferable and stuffy.
My small is a good thing to feel. It takes me from feeling like Piglet and makes me feel like Pooh. I can relax and trust and not rush around, fret and try to control everyone.
The boss of me makes me hush too, Lisa. He calls it settling down or straightening up and flying right but the method is much the same.
Marci and Lisa, I am so glad you enjoyed this. I loved writing it, it made me feel good. I also love that we can say we feel like Pooh and that is a good thing.
And Lisa, thank you for making me think of this sort of thing. We are all, it seems, this sort of bear.
Paul, you wrote while I was writing!
I love the Tao of Pooh and the Te of Piglet. I am starting to read a bit more on Taoism on the advice of a lovely girl who we sometimes spy round and about these parts.
And the girl you describe sounds a lot like me.
Big cuddles- it is that sort of post.
Oh… sob!
I hope that was a good sob and not a sad sob.
This is so beautiful and poignant, Poppy. Sigh. You have me all contemplative now.
Paul – I was about to recommend that very same book! Poppy beat both of us to it.
Poppy, I know it's way past bedtime in England, but this was such a great post that I wanted to read it one more time before my bedtime–because this is charming, charming, charming. Thank you for being just who you are! And Paul, I love what you said, too. It was very touching, and very true. And I love the Tao of Pooh and the Te of Piglet, and I wonder what it means that we're all loving the same books. But then it doesn't surprise me very much at all, because we are all bears of a certain kind, after all. Good night, sleep tight. I'm so glad you're there.
I think what you call your small is what I call my little side. Oh and confession time I did not know that Piglet was a Pig until I was in my twenties! I just thought that Piglet was his name. He just never really looked much like a pig to me,well not until he was Disneyfied. I love the original drawings best,so glad you used them here.
Thank you Season, you make me think all the time so I am happy to return the favour.
Lisa – blushes and thank you for wrting such a delightful note to wake up to.
Scunge – cheesecake! And I suspect you are right about the small/ little side.
Disney Winnie the Pooh piccies make me all mad- too bright, not right at all.
Thank you for writing this for me.
Pingback:Spank Me Safe | Through Ariannas Looking Glass
Pingback:Spank Me Safe |
Pingback:Spank Me Safe | Through Ariannas Looking Glass